Let the Games Begin

Knowing that at some point things would become obvious, I finally made an announcement to my co-workers during an all-staff meeting. Congratulations were extended, etc, and really, that should have been the end of it. Right?

Wrong.

Now every conversation I have is tinged with references to either pregnancy woes or to the headaches of having children. People don't like to impart good news, apparently, just the bad stuff:

Me: I slept pretty well last night, except the dog barked in the middle of the night.
Female Co-worker: Oh, that'll change. Just you wait a few months.
Male Co-worker: Yeah, and then you won't sleep for six months after the baby's born, heh heh heh!

Ha. Ha. Who asked you?

Or this exchange after a rather beligerent co-worker had an inappropriate outburst at another meeting I conducted:

Female Co-worker: I thought you handled that very well, you never got defensive and you never lost your cool.
Me: Thanks. I didn't see losing my temper as being very productive.
Female Co-worker: Of course, with the little one on the way your hormones will probably take over and you might not be able to keep your cool, so if you ever have to blow off steam you can come talk to me.

Oh, give me a break. Not the Hormone Defense again.....

And, my favorite, sudden scrutiny over my eating habits. I've been pregnant for almost four months with nobody the wiser, now all of sudden when I eat a late lunch they assume I must have eaten before and now I am "eating for two."

Male Co-worker: Oh, eating again, eh?
Me: Uh... no.... I've just managed to sit down for lunch now.
Male Co-worker, oblivious to previous statement: Well, once you have the kid, you won't have time to eat so you should eat all you can.

I'm sorry... what?

Given that I'm not even really showing yet, I can't wait until I do so I can get all sorts of inane comments regarding pregnancy, my personal appearance and what the future holds. Maybe I should start commenting on my overweight co-workers appearance too. Oh, eating for two, eh? Or how about the woman downstairs who has a noticeable limp? Maybe I should start commenting on that. Hey, can I touch your leg?

Or, maybe I should just keep my cool, raging hormones or no.